BEERSEXCHIPS N GRAVYMACC
Macc. English Dictionary
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McCavity- This has got the all time greatest guitar solo in it.
Mard- Oh Yeah? Says who?

O'Peesha- During this song at a gig in Leeds, Mungo threw a chair into the crowd.
Ah,
the look on his face when the crowd threw back six chairs and a table.

 

TART WITH THE HEART

Git-Featuring an aria by Binbag, whose voice has been known to fossilise dogshit.
The catchy riff was stumbled upon by O'Peesha when he was trying to work out
'Mr Tambourine Man'.

McCavity- I know what this one's about. That journalist woman we kidnapped and dumped
in South Wales. She was dead ugly, and none of us shagged her.
Chorley- Even the roadies never touched her-she was really upset. A few nights later she's in
the Bear's telling everyone that we've all got micropenises and we're crap shags and we're gay and all that.
McCavity- Its in the paper, it must be true!

 

THAT'S GAY

Git- Muttley lists all the things which he finds objectionable about Chorley.
Originally the song
was 3 hours long,
but a 10 note in the correct palm secured a satisfactory edit.

 

THINKING IN THE DARK

Git- Riots swept through Merry England in 1981, and Macc was not to be outdone. Someone
chucked a brick through Arighi Bianchi's window, and was promptly arrested.
There the riot ended. In court, the judge asked:
"What caused you to perpetrate such a vile act?"
"Half a bottle of Clan Dew, Your Honour." Was the reply.
Nothing to do with the song, but I had to slip it in somewhere.

Muttley- Well some questions need answers! How do blind gits wipe their arse?
O'Peesha- Yeah, like how do they know every snowflake is different?
Dread- Dey all look alike to I. Innit?

 

TICKET TO DIE

Git- Muttley and Mard list all the lengths they will go to to secure a cup final ticket.
Wishful thinking, as their beloved Macc Town have yet to get beyond the 3rd round.

 

TORREMOLINOS

Git- This ditty has appeared in many guises.
No one could agree which version was best.
Personally I liked the first version,
but my bruises would suggest that it was a
mistake to offer any opinion to my petulant little charges.

Knobby- I like Spanish women's armpits.

 

TURTLES HEADS

O'Peesha- The original version had an out of tune piano and pint pots. It was dead good. Then
Mard came along with all these fancy chords. I said: "Diminished ninths? You big pansy!" Of course I didn't use those exact words, I probably said:
"Brilliant Mard, you're the best axeman ever."

Slob- Years ago, Muttley came round to my hovel, shouting: "Slob! You up yet?"
I was on the bog, and shouted back:"Ang on! There's a turd hanging out me arse."
Of course, he'd brought some woman round to meet me. Ah well...

 

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