Macc. English Dictionary



Git-This concerns Hectic House's resident cartoonist, Stammer, and his attempt to populate the planet with stuttering rugrats. His mum became a grandma at 32. Stammer will piss that.

McCavity- Stammer used to get sent on errands. An hour later, the phone would ring:
"Hello? Its the printers. One of your lads is here, and he can't tell us what he wants."
Slimy told us to pin a sign on him before he went on his errands: "When you get there, just point at the sign? OK?" So we'd write signs like: "Hello Mr Jones, please give me a pack of strings, and a snare batter head. There's a tenner in my top pocket. You cunt."


Muttley- This was written on the day of the 'Live Aid' concert. The press picked up on it really fast, saying I was a racist twat who drowned puppies, ate babies and parked on yellow lines.

Git- One of the tabloids got Sir Bob to warn people away from the album, and pressing plants
refused to press it. I was delighted to see sales go through the roof.

O'Peesha- Barrel made this the anthem that it is- especially for the way he pronounces the word
"chips" in a humorous and amusing fashion.


Git-The EP version was always played at concerts in preference to the LP version-
possibly because the latter contained a nifty bit of bass playing somewhat beyond Muttley's capabilities. The secret was that I employed two fat muscians from a group called Cream. Their names? Snack Mousse and Ginger Biscuit of course.

Beater- Muttley nicked this riff off me. I used to play it in a punk band in the 70s.
It was shit then, and its still shit now. My guitar break's dead good though.


Git- This story concerns Mr & Mrs Mussolini- a roadie and his wife.
Mrs Mussolini showed us the flowers and anniversary card sent by her husband.
It was addressed to "Fluffy".
She went on to tell us about their romantic weekend in the
Lake District.
When asked what he's been doing at the weekend, Mussolini replied:
"Been up Moss Side, shooting niggers." I think not.

Bald Eagle- When we recorded this, Chorley had difficulty getting his complicated
drum roll right. When he'd gone, I set up a microphone on the stairs, and McCavity threw the kit off the landing. Chorley still thinks its the best thing he's ever done.


Git- Muttley's favourite topic is how this country has gone downhill since we stopped having wars with France. He thinks that the French are garlic eating, soap avoiding, cowardly, sheep burning, dirty, horrible, oily, lazy, filthy bastards...
... all this from a day trip to Ostend.

Beater- We did a gig in Antwerp, and Muttley's having a right go at the audience, as usual.
This feminist trollop with a bone through her nose gets onstage, grabs my mike and starts slagging us off. Saying we're racist and sexist and all the usual bollocks. The audience hadn't got a clue what's going on. She was really throwing her dummy out, and Muttley's egging her on, then he gets the crowd to chant: 'Get your tits out for the lads'.
None of them knew what they were saying, they just repeated it. They were all French.
O'Peesha- Antwerp's in Belgium isn't it?
Beater- Huh? Oh, bollocks.