THE BARTER SYSTEM As you have probably guessed, all we will do with the mail order money is spend it on beer and fags. So why not cut out the middle man? However, we know:- a) Fags are cheaper abroad b) Beer outside Macc is rubbish EXCHANGE-RATE Item No. $/€ £ Embassy NUMBER 1 20 5-00 5-00 Benson & Hedges 20 5-00 5-00 Smelly French Fags vingt 5-00 5-00 Embassy Regal 20 5-00 5-00 SILK CUT 20 1-00 0-50 Want a cassette? !f you're English send one pack of fags, if you're foreign, send two BACK TO THE OFFY

I AM A STUPID FOREIGNER WHO DOESN'T UNDERSTAND SIMPLE ENGLISH I AM FOREIGN Ich liebe lederhosen Je suis un pederaste Gee, I ain't too sure