Macc. English Dictionary


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In this life, there's a couple of certs, one is death, the other's a nurse
Lucy's old, they say she's past it, but I gave her one, and her tits are that big.
They said: 'Bollocks, they're made of plastic!' And that I never touched her,
But that's just batshit.

Lucy Lastic, we shagged everywhere, on the washer, in the kitchen,
Twice on the stairs
(Did you fuck, you're making it up)

I got her a pint, took her back to our house,
'Are you sure you want to play with my little red mouse?'
I found its tail by some loose elastic, the Russians are coming!
This is drastic.
I closed the curtains, sat on her belly, poured dogfood in her cleavage
And thought about ripped wellies

Lucy Lastic on a haystack, two pounds of tripe to take up the slack
Lucy Lastic we shagged in a skip, dead cats in her knickers, tea bags on her tits
We did it in a snowdrift in Wildboarclough, but Lucy Lastic was loose enough.

1989 The Macc Lads

N.B.-"Kitchen"- A room containing white pieces of machinery, women and the fridge.
         "Washer"- Washing machine- the square white thing with the round window.
                            ( Only women and poofs know how they work- don't worry about it).