He squeezes in
the van, all twenty four stones
Gets three kebabs, eats them on his own
Quick trouser cough, Nevis touches cloth,
Fuck! Fuck! Abandon truck! All the windows steaming up
Gas! Gas! Quick
lads! The air in here is turning brown
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! Get the fucking windows down
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! Nevis gone and done a 'troop'!
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! I think the big fat twat has followed through
Ben Nevis filled
the van with 'Eau de Turd'
He would have swung for less gas at Nuremburg
Four chicken curries, eight tandooris, boiled eggs, three kebabs,
Fuck sake, no one strike a match
Gas! Gas! Quick
lads! Everybody's choking to death
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! Loud and sour botty breath
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! Dig a trench, avoid the stench
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! Nevis, filthy, fat and flatulent
At a transport
caff, he gets baked beans
Rectum rasp blows a hole in his jeans
Everybody choking, nobody smoking
He looks round, he blames the dog, covered in a smelly fog
Gas! Gas! Quick
lads! What the fuck has he been eating?
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! It must have had some rotten meat in
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! I've got tears in my eyes
Gas! Gas! Quick lads! I think a rat crawled up his arsehole and
died
(Some considerable time ago)
